"Courageous care partners recharge with self-care, striving for peaceful pinnacles
in patience, persistence, and positive 
changes, knowing when to conquer and when to comfort."

Mental Health Awareness Month – Caring for the Care Partner

May 01, 2022 by Eileen Adler

“Remember to look up at the stars and not down at your feet. Try to make sense of what you see and wonder about what makes the universe exist. Be curious. And however difficult life may seem, there is always something you can do and succeed at. It matters that you don't just give up.” ― Stephen Hawkin.


In Buddhism, the number 10,000 is a symbol for limitless. A well-known Buddhist phrase is “ten thousand joys and ten thousand sorrows” means the journey of life is in continuous change. Much of life is outside our control, but we can make use of circumstances and experiences to advance our well-being. Everything changes. Nothing stays the same. We might want to let the sadness in, warm it up with acceptance, then calmly release it.

Ten Thousand Joys, Ten Thousand Sorrows by Olivia Ames Hoblitzelle, the subtitle explains it all: “A Couple’s Journey through Alzheimer’s.”  

If you have been or are currently a care partner, many of these thoughts will ring true.

  • I busied myself, hoping to avoid what was happening.
  • Our threads of connection frayed. We increasingly lived in worlds that were drifting apart.
  • It was sometimes hard to keep grief from spiraling into depression.
  • It was I who depended upon my care receiver, but the shift forced us to surrender our roles through the journey. 
  • I knew that along with the most difficult times, there would be lessons and some hidden treasures. Unseen blessings were woven through the complexities
  • Our experiences are always teaching us as incentives for growth. Caregiving was an opportunity for me to practice the positive qualities of compassion, patience, generosity, and kindness, it helped give meaning to the humblest of tasks.
  • I realized that I couldn’t do it all. I needed helpers. “It’s never overreacting to ask for what you want and need.” Amy Poehler
  • I deepened in love in ways I couldn’t have imagined. I learned that compassion for myself, and for others could embrace anything.
  • “Altogether, the idea of meditation is not to create states of ecstasy or absorption, but to experience being.” —Chögyam Trungpa (1939-1987), a preeminent teacher of Tibetan Buddhism.

Life Lesson: “The present moment is filled with joy and happiness. If you are attentive, you will see it.”—Thich Nhat Hanh