EILEEN ADLER

“He never hangs up his towel!” lamented a woman in my support group. Each day, she explained, she walks into their shared bathroom, and there it is, on the hook that holds the bathmat and the bathmat is left on the floor. Why? Why can’t he remember to put his towel where it belongs? I sat there silently thinking, gosh, this happens with my husband some of the time. Is this a guy thing? But getting to the root of the problem I acknowledged that it’s not the towel but rather our reaction to this recurring annoyance. Is it important that it goes on a certain towel rod? Who cares, I thought! When I see the towel in a different location, I simply move it to where I want it and hang up the bathmat so both will be dry when needed. Most days, this is a fine solution, but other days, it’s one more thing to attend to and those are the days when I am feeling so overwhelmed that even the smallest thing rattles me. Understanding this clears my mind; hang up the towel and move on. I want to knit, or read, or make dinner, or go for my walk . . . no need to focus on this . . . but it can be challenging. Ironically, it’s these little things that seem to catch us off guard.